Destiny Star's Blog

The curriculum at the school I’ve been accepted to is absolutely amazing. I thought I’d outline it so people can realize how much of a blessing my admission to this school is. It’s giving me the kind of chance I never thought I’d have to do some truly amazing things with my art.

The curriculum starts out with a full year worth of basic studio art and computer graphics classes. This is meant to give me and my fellow students the basis of an artistic vocabulary that will be necessary whatever field of design we wind up in. Also that year is a survey course of all the art and design majors that the Institute offers. At the end of the first year, I’ll be able to choose between 3D design, studio arts, and video arts fields of concentration, but not an actual major.

The second year is spent with the basic courses of the concentration I will have chosen. I’ll spend that year learning about each individual major in my concentration and what sort of work is done during the schooling for each major and what sort of work I would do in industry after I graduate. At the end of the second year, I’ll choose a major.

The third year I’ll spend learning specialized skills and software to complete the more advanced coursework, as well as more theory classes that my major might require. Third year is usually the toughest academically, but without the failure rate of the first year.

The fourth year is spent with the most advanced design and theory courses and studio projects. Midway through the fourth year, I’ll basically have earned a Bachelor of Arts, or Fine Arts, depending on the major I choose, but it won’t be awarded until I completely finish my course of study.

My fifth and final year I’ll spend in more course and studio work, as well as on creating a Master’s thesis or thesis project. At the end of the year, I’ll graduate with a BA or BFA and a MA or MFA in my chosen field.

All in all, the degree will probably cost me nearly $200,000. More financial aid will start to be available next fall, and I’m praying to God I get that. If not, I’ll likely be able to get scholarships as well to cover more of the costs, in addition to keeping the scholarship that gives me a free room and meal plan in their dorms.

So that’s the best description of the great blessing that’s been put right in front of me. I just have to figure out how to take advantage of it. Thirty-two thousand dollars sounds like a big hurdle, but how big is it compared to how far I’ve come?

For years I was an abused girl who got used for sex by every man in her life. I was lost and alone, working in a job where I got taken advantage of every night, lived in fear of being raped at any turn, and didn’t have any real hopes for the future but to maybe marry some rich man as a trophy wife and eventually get discarded for someone younger and prettier, hoping that I got enough to live off of in the divorce.

Now, I’m born again, well on my way to being a good Catholic girl who goes to mass every day. I’ve quit stripping, I’ve quit having sex, I’ve quit even associating with men very much. I’m admitted to a school that is to art and design what Harvard and Yale are to business and law, what MIT and Stanford are to computer science.

If I work hard the next five years of school, I’ll never have to strip or sell myself in any way to support myself and live a good life. I’ll have skills that will make me more valuable to employers than I’d ever imagined being. I’ll be free to live a life where I can give of myself to God and live the way He wants me to.

I’ll be able to marry a man who can see me as a woman who will help him and his children attain heaven, rather than as a pretty plaything to keep around as long as I’m interesting. I’ll be able to know that the man I marry will be able to look past my past sins and see me for who I am and for who I can be. Jesus told me that in our conversation in my dream, and told me that my gifts of art and my admission to the Institute were his gifts to me, I just had to take them.

Hooray! My scholarship fund is set up through my friend’s church! Their congregation is putting some money in, and hopefully other people will soon be willing to donate or give grants. I want to thank God for putting these amazing people in my life, and thank this church for making it possible for all the people who want to help to do so.

They’re a small house church in Kansas taking me on as a project, and eventually others as well. They’ve set up the scholarship to be “for the purpose of funding the education of sex workers who have found Jesus Christ and wish to leave their time as sex workers behind them.”

So within a few days, I’ll have an address through the church where donations can be sent, but right now I’ve got a paypal account where donations can be made. This is amazingly exciting to me, as it’s unlikely I’ll get much financial aid through the school, as they disburse their funds at the beginning of the fall semester.

I applied for the Spring semester because admission was less competitive and because I’d already missed the deadline for the Fall semester, and I want out of this line of work. So, if you want to donate to the scholarship fund which will help me (and eventually others working in sex industries) out of my line of work and into school, click the paypal button at the end of this post or in the sidebar!

God bless my friend Eric and his flock for doing this to help me and others like me!

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The creepy guy from Monday night was back again on Tuesday night. I’ve got a really bad feeling about him. He’s about 5′9” with shaggy but not super-long brown hair. He’s in his mid-twenties, thin-ish, and just kinda sits in back near the bar drinking a couple of small drinks and watching everything that’s happening.

The way he acts reminds me of my stalker a bit when he finally found the club I work at, and that really sets my teeth on edge. I’m really just getting this feeling that he’s stalking someone, but I don’t know who. I’ve let the bouncers know about the vibe I’m getting off him, but they’re not going to just throw him out.

I’m getting scared, and if I didn’t need $30,000 by the end of December, plus my living expenses until then, I’d be out of this job in a heartbeat. I’d drop this and run, find another club in some other town to work at. I know God has put me on a path to this school, and that I’ll get there somehow. Right now though, I’m wondering if the road I’m taking is the right way to get there.

I’m going to spend a lot of time today praying about the directions to God’s next destination for me. Do I stay working at this club? Do I leave and work some menial job I’m barely qualified for until January when school starts? How do I get the tuition money together? Is this destination where God wants me to go? If not this design school, then where?

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